Archive for February, 2007

Finding Strength in Adversity

Tuesday, February 27th, 2007

An Angel with a Sense of Humor
Like many baby boomers, Maggie had to be the ’strong one’ when tragedy struck. But a heavenly visitor gave her hope. By Ken Schuman and Ron Paxton Adapted from ‘The Michelangelo Method: Release Your Inner Masterpiece and Create an Extraordinary Life.’ Used with permission.

Maggie had just turned 50. She had a good job in market research and a successful marriage with two great kids. Her 22-year-old son Josh was about to graduate from college, and her 25-year-old daughter Lisa was engaged to be married. Maggie was helping to plan the wedding. Now some people would have just thanked their lucky stars, knocked on wood or, in Maggie’s Jewish faith kept the evil eye away by saying “pooh-pooh.” But Maggie’s eyes were on bigger things. Fifty meant middle age and Maggie had the ambition to start her own marketing company. She was nervous, though, about the risks involved. She was in many ways a conservative person who liked to play things safe. On the other hand, if she was going to do start her own business, she believed that she should start now. She came to me for help with coaching her through her work transition. We were beginning to go over the potential risks and rewards of entrepreneurial life when Maggie’s world fell apart. We kept going with our sessions, making some progress here and there. But much of the time I just tried to support her in her efforts to get through the day. For her son Josh had just been diagnosed with lymphoma, a potentially fatal cancer in his chest. “I’m so scared, I’m nearly paralyzed,” she told me. The More You Know, the Less You Have to Fear “Perhaps educating yourself about Josh’s problem would ease your mind,” I suggested. “You can use the research skills that serve you so well at work to find out what you can do for Josh.” Maggie brightened a little. “That’s a thought,” she said. “Usually the more I know about something the more comfortable I am. It’s when I know little or nothing that I get crazy.” Maggie went online to learn what she could. Assuming that Josh’s diagnosis was correct, his chances were better than 50-50. But the reality of Josh’s illness and the possibility that he might not survive were sinking in. “That was one of the worst nights of my entire life,” Maggie said. “I was in bed shaking the whole night. I just couldn’t make my mind think constructive thoughts. Fear just took over.” We discussed what strengths Maggie could use to cope with her crisis. In addition to research, Maggie’s strengths included her networking ability, resilience, sense of humor, and faith in God. She could rely on these to help her deal with this crisis. But first she had to calm herself. I asked her if she wanted me to make a visualization tape for her. “I’d be really grateful for anything that can ease my mind,” she said. Later she told me that this tape was one of the best tools she had for coping with Josh’s problem. On the tape I asked Maggie to think about Josh in the future. Think about him speaking to groups of people and telling them how he licked his problem and became a better person for it. And picture herself dancing with Josh at his wedding five years from now. Picture herself in the doctor’s office and the doctor saying to Josh, “You’re cured!” Also, encase Josh in a bubble and picture him with sun shining on him, sending him healing energy. And picture Josh floating with her on a lake, being calm and being healed. Maggie also tried to find support within her community. “My husband and I have a very good relationship, but it became too painful to talk to him about some of this. It was easier to talk to people who were less connected,” she said. “After Josh got sick I couldn’t sleep,” Maggie continued. “I would wake up very early in the morning. So I went to the early morning service at my temple. The people were very warm and welcoming. In the beginning I would just sit there and cry. One man had been through cancer and survived. One had a son who had had cancer in high school and recovered. So I talked to them; that helped.” “I’m very fatalistic,” Maggie added. “I wasn’t angry. I never said ‘why me; why Josh?’ In fact, when one of my friends said, ‘Oh, it shouldn’t have been Josh,’ I responded, ‘Oh, then it should have been someone else’s child?’ It is what it is. I did have the belief that God had the power to cure him and heal him if that was the plan.” Maggie believed in the power of prayer. “I told everyone I knew about it and asked everyone, no matter what their religion, to pray for him. I obviously prayed for his healing,” she said. “But part of what I would pray for is for all of us to be strong so that we could get through this.” Don’t Underestimate the Power of Your Beliefs Josh was diagnosed in July, and fortunately things were slowing down for the summer at Maggie’s company. Her boss was very understanding and agreed to give Maggie two months leave to be with Josh and care for him. Josh started chemotherapy treatments. He mostly responded well but had a bad reaction to the prednisone he was taking and started hallucinating. “That was very scary for Josh—he thought he was going crazy,” Maggie said. “We needed to go to a psychopharmacologist, who reduced his dosage.” “I’m a bit ‘woo-woo,’ if you know what I mean, and wanted to take Josh to a hypnotherapist and a herbologist, thinking maybe that might help him. But he didn’t want any of that. One piece of very good advice I got from a friend: ‘He’s 22 years old. He’s not a baby. The more you can treat him like an adult, the better. Let him run his own case whenever you can.’ So I tried to do that—to take a step back, be respectful of him and let him make choices.” A Time to Dance and a Time to Mourn Josh had been making excellent progress with his treatments, so Lisa’s wedding that November was a truly joyous affair. Josh provided a very funny “brother’s toast” to the newlyweds. With Josh’s illness and Lisa’s wedding Maggie’s family had been a center of people’s attention. After the wedding Josh had commented, “At least now we’re out of the spotlight.” Then two weeks later came the accident. Maggie’s mother and father, who lived in Florida, were driving home late one night. Their car crossed the divider and was hit by a large truck. Probably her father had fallen asleep at the wheel, or he may have had a heart attack. Maggie would never know for sure — both of her parents were killed instantly. “When my parents died I was numb. I felt like I was going out of my mind. I was falling apart. I went to my rabbi once or twice. He recommended a therapist to go to. I went there once, but I didn’t think he was helpful.” “I thought a lot about their deaths and the fatalistic part of me felt that in a way they died so that Josh could live, as weird as that might sound. Because now they are up there and maybe they can help. “Steve, Josh, Lisa and I all gave eulogies at my parents’ funeral. When Josh had spoken at the wedding, he was bald with no eyebrows and no eyelashes. He got up at the funeral and spoke about his grandparents and then he said, ‘This is the last time I make a public speech bald. The next time I make a speech I want to have hair.’” Maggie’s Dream Three weeks after the funeral, Maggie had a dream. “It was the most vivid dream I’ve ever had,” she told me. “I was sitting with my mother in her kitchen, surrounded by her plants, which she loved, and sunlight was pouring in. She said to me very clearly, ‘At least Josh has a good head of hair,’ and we both started laughing.” When I woke up, I felt as if my mother was telling me she knew that Josh would be fine.” Was it an angel, Maggie wondered. Could it have been her mother’s spirit giving her hope and comfort? "In our family, humor helps us cope. So any angel that visited me had to have a sense of humor." Sometime later Josh developed a cough, which was one of the original symptoms of his cancer. Maggie said, “I was taking him to his doctor’s appointment and was feeling that I was cracking up. I was just so scared. I was thinking that, God forbid, Josh was relapsing. And I was feeling that I couldn’t go through that again. Then I remembered the dream about my mother, and somehow I felt better about everything.” The cough went away–it turned out to be a minor cold. Josh continued progressing with his treatments. “He recovered completely, thank God,” Maggie said. Now he’s 31, married, with a baby of his own. Now Josh helps others. Anytime anyone who has cancer wants to talk to him, Josh will make the time. Also if there’s a mother who needs to talk, I’ll make myself available, because I know what I went through.” Maggie never dreamed of another angel or experienced another visitation from her mother. But she found a stronger faith, and she looked at life differently. Finding Strength in Adversity Through her experience with Josh, Maggie developed a different attitude toward risk, which spilled over into all other areas of her life. For she had confronted her worst fears, the potential death of her child and, using her existing strengths, had come through it intact. Better than intact. For her faith in her ability to deal with her worst nightmares was strengthened, as was her faith in the future. So when we returned to work on whether Maggie should start her own marketing company, I found we were no longer discussing “whether” but rather “how” to make her concept a reality. Authors Ken Schuman and Ron Paxton are life and career coaches. To learn more about their work, visit www.michelangelomethod.com.

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What an uplifting story dont u all agree???

Lov each bit of it …. I hav nuffin to say, just a smile to all…..

Hmm What u seen as problems now will fade away thru time, but all in all dont dwell in it, deal with it…. last year was the worst year n the best at the same time… the best ,knowin how to really lov again n the worst when evrythings just fell apart wif jobs, love, and many others…all in all i wud like to extend my gratitude, my lov n thankfullness to all that help to giv support to me when life’s gettin so tough…… now lookin back, im so grateful evrythings back to normal yayyyyyy but one problems over then another comes… hehehe well tryin to release myself from the confusion, so wish me luckkkkk woteva luck it is, i ll be needing it to get up again, n once again be happy mely +) hehehe

Im startin to think now, wot will happen to me in the future??? mayb laughin on how silly my probs are… heheheh well woteva it is i dunno, n i guess durin that time, i ll b facin serious problem, bigger than now… funny huh ??? problems is just unavoidable. No choice but to just take woteva that comes, hopefully i learn on how to deal wif it, strong enuf to endure the ups n downs in life n be cheerful as I always am…. +)

Take care guyssss

Lov Always, Mel

Hi HI HI

Monday, February 26th, 2007

Rainy Daysss - Lov the smell of the fresh air +)

Rain always Good for our gardens .. cant believe how our backyard has turned out to be amazingly lavish green (looks like a small forest)… my mom really knows wot shes doin … +)

hmmm For the past few days, I feel quite weak actually - evrytime the weather changes, so does my health plus today is that time in the month n the pain is really killing  meeeeeee  =_(

anyway i hav nuffin much to say, got exam tmw =(

Hmm I’ll end the blog with a quote for the day, "The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost. "G.K. Chesterton

So always enjoy urself in evrythin in anythin….. +)

Lov, Mel

Swan Lake performance

Thursday, February 22nd, 2007

Swan Lake begins at a royal court. Prince Siegfried, heir to the kingdom, must declare a wife at his birthday ball. Upset that he cannot marry for love, Siegfried escapes into the forest at night. As he sees a flock of swans flying overhead, he aims his crossbow and readies himself for their landing by the lakeside. When one comes into view, however, he stops; before him is a beautiful creature dressed in white feathers, more woman than swan. Enamoured, the two dance and Siegfried learns that the swan maiden is the princess Odette. An evil sorcerer, Von Rothbart, captured her and used his magic to turn Odette into a swan by day and woman by night.

A retinue of other captured swan-maidens attend Odette in the environs of Swan Lake, which was formed by the tears of her parents when she was kidnapped by Von Rothbart. Once Siegfried knows her story, he takes great pity on her and falls in love. As he begins to swear his love to her - an act that will render the sorcerer’s spell powerless - Von Rothbart appears. Siegfried threatens to kill him but Odette intercedes; if Von Rothbart dies before the spell is broken, it can never be undone.

The Prince returns to the castle to attend the ball. Von Rothbart arrives in disguise with his own daughter Odile, making her seem identical to Odette in all respects except that she wears black while Odette wears white. The prince mistakes her for Odette, dances with her, and proclaims to the court that he intends to make her his wife. Only a moment too late, Siegfried sees the real Odette and realizes his mistake. The method in which Odette appears varies: in some versions she arrives at the castle, while in other versions Von Rothbart shows Siegfried a magical vision of her.

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Matthew Bourne’s Swan Lake;The ballet is particularly known for having the parts of the swans danced by men rather than women.

The unhappy and unloved Prince is mocked, betrayed and rejected by everyone around him. When he decides to commit suicide by throwing himself in a lake at a city park, a beautiful Swan emerges from the water. The Prince and The Swan become close friends, but their friendship is destined to end in tragedy. Written by Anonymous 

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Hi sweet ppl,

Yesterday I went to see Matthew’s Bourne swan lake version… Tell the truth dont really like that typical version becos it portrays tragedy- lots of miseries n unhappiness with unhappy ending..

Feel so sad but thats reality.. many people are lost, lost in their own tragedies of life… tryin to find a way out n lots are still searching, not knowin that those tiresome action will bring them nowhere becos to start wif, no one knows wher to search it… on n on we look for satisfaction externally, but the true beauty only exist in our heart … in that pure kindness,compassion n love for other beings including ourselvesss… Thers so much longing for othersss to love us, thats probably why the more older we become,the more miseries we face… becos that needs to be loved by others is far more important than to selflessly love others…. I recommend to try n hav pets to understand how beautiful to lov others selflessly, rmb this only works if u do it wholeheartedly wif good intention embedded deeply in ur heart +)

Like u guys, im still searching… writing these blogs, sort of like givin myself advice n reminder of wot i shud be thinkin, wat directions to go in life n wishful hope that each one of u’s can discover strength in urself, discover wisdom in urselves, discover smile in ur eyes n discover compassion in ur heart +)

This is my advice to others ; life is already hard enuf, dont make it much more harder for urself… relax n expect less, learn to love, keep on learning n laugh often.. hehehehe

To those who knows me, these blogs represent my other side… It is still me but in reality im just as hopeless as anybody else, as crazy as anyone else n full of defilements to overcome…

Lov u All, Mel

Equanimity by Venerable Nyanaponika Thera

Tuesday, February 20th, 2007

Equanimity (upekkha)

Equanimity is a perfect, unshakable balance of mind, rooted in insight.

Looking at the world around us, and looking into our own heart, we see clearly how difficult it is to attain and maintain balance of mind.

Looking into life we notice how it continually moves between contrasts: rise and fall, success and failure, loss and gain, honour and blame. We feel how our heart responds to all this happiness and sorrow, delight and despair, disappointment and satisfaction, hope and fear. These waves of emotion carry us up and fling us down; and no sooner do we find rest, than we are in the power of a new wave again. How can we expect to get a footing on the crest of the waves? How shall we erect the building of our lives in the midst of this ever restless ocean of existence, if not on the Island of Equanimity.

A world where that little share of happiness alloted to beings is mostly secured after many disappointments, failures and defeats; a world where only the courage to start anew, again and again, promises success; a world where scanty joy grows amidst sickness, separation and death; a world where beings who were a short while ago connected with us by sympathetic joy, are at the next moment in want of our compassion - such a world needs equanimity.

But the kind of equanimity required has to be based on vigilant presence of mind, not on indifferent dullness. It has to be the result of hard, deliberate training, not the casual outcome of a passing mood. But equanimity would not deserve its name if it had to be produced by exertion again and again. In such a case it would surely be weakened and finally defeated by the vicissitudes of life. True equanimity, however, should be able to meet all these severe tests and to regenerate its strength from sources within. It will possess this power of resistance and self-renewal only if it is rooted in insight.

What, now, is the nature of that insight? It is the clear understanding of how all these vicissitudes of life originate, and of our own true nature. We have to understand that the various experiences we undergo result from our kamma - our actions in thought, word and deed - performed in this life and in earlier lives. Kamma is the womb from which we spring (kamma-yoni), and whether we like it or not, we are the inalienable "owners" of our deeds (kamma-saka). But as soon as we have performed any action, our control over it is lost: it forever remains with us and inevitably returns to us as our due heritage (kamma-dayada). Nothing that happens to us comes from an "outer" hostile world foreign to ourselves; everything is the outcome or our own mind and deeds. Because this knowledge frees us from fear, it is the first basis of equanimity. When, in everything that befalls us we only meet ourselves, why should we fear?

If, however, fear and uncertainty should arise, we know the refuge where it can be allayed: our good deeds (kamma-patisarana). By taking this refuge, confidence and courage will grow within us - confidence in the protecting power of our good deeds done in the past; courage to perform more good deeds right now, despite the discouraging hardships of our present life. For we know that noble and selfless deeds provide the best defence against the hard blows of destiny, that it is never too late but always the right time for good actions. If that refuge, in doing good and avoiding evil, becomes firmly established within us, one day we shall feel assured: "More and more ceases the misery and evil rooted in the past. And this present life - I try to make it spotless and pure. What else can the future bring than increase of the good?" And from that cer-tainty our minds will become serene, and we shall gain the strength of patience of equanimity to bear with all our present adversities. Then our deeds will be our friends (kamma-bandhu).

Likewise, all the various events of our lives, being the result of our deeds, will also be our friends, even if they bring us sorrow and pain. Our deeds return to us in a guise that often makes them unrecognizable. Sometimes our actions return to us in the way that others treat us, some-times as a thorough upheaval in our lives; often the results are against our expectations or contrary to our wills. Such experiences point out to us consequences of our deeds we did not foresee; they render visible half-conscious motives of our former actions which we tried to hide even from ourselves, covering them up with various pretexts. If we learn to see things from this angle, and to read the messages conveyed by our own experience, then suffering, too, will be our friend. It will be a stern friend, but a truthful and well-meaning one who teaches us the most difficult subject, knowledge about ourselves, and warns us against abysses towards which we are moving blindly. By looking at suffering as our teacher and friend, we shall better succeed in enduring it with equa-nimity.

Consequently, the teaching of kamma will give us a powerful impulse for freeing ourselves from kamma, from those deeds which again and again throw us into the suffering of repeated births. Disgust will arise at our own craving, at our own delusion, at our own propen-sity to create situations which try our strength, our resistance, and our equanimity.

The second insight on which equanimity should be based is the Buddha’s teaching of no-self (anatta). This doctrine shows that in the ultimate sense deeds are not performed by any self, nor do their results affect any self. Further, it shows that if there is no self, we cannot speak of "my own". It is the delusion of a self that creates suffering and hin-ders or disturbs equanimity. If this or that quality of ours is blamed, one thinks: "I am blamed" and equanimity is shaken. If this or that work does not succeed, one thinks: "My work has failed and equanimity is shaken. If wealth or loved ones are lost, one thinks: "What is mine has gone" and equanimity is shaken.

To establish equanimity as an unshakable state of mind, one has to give up all possessive thoughts of "mine", beginning with little things from which it is easy to detach oneself, and gradually working up to possessions and aims to which one’s whole heart clings. One also has to give up the counterpart to such thoughts, all egoistic thoughts of "self’", beginning with a small section of one’s personality, with qualities of minor importance, with small weaknesses one clearly sees, and gradually working up to those emotions and aversions which one regards as the centre of one’s being. Thus detachment should be practised.

To the degree we forsake thoughts of "mine" or "self"’ equanimity will enter our hearts. For how can anything we realize to be foreign and void of a self cause us agitation due to lust, hatred or grief? Thus the teaching of non-self will be our guide on the path to deliverance, to per-fect equanimity.

Equanimity is the crown and culmination of the four sublime states. But this should not be understood to mean that equanimity is the nega-tion of love, compassion, and sympathetic joy, or that it leaves them behind as inferior. Far from that, equanimity includes and pervades them fully, just as they fully pervade perfect equanimity. 

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  1. Upekkha/Upeksha: equanimity, or learning to accept both loss and gain, praise and blame, success and failure with detachment, equally, for oneself and for others; equanimity means "not to distinguish between friend, enemy or stranger, but regard every sentient being as equal. It is a clear-minded tranquil state of mind - not being overpowered by delusions, mental dullness or agitation."

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The hardest state of mind to overcome… How can someone not be tremendously affected when evrythings gone wrong in their life??? The understanding of the law of Kamma does make an impact but sometimes it doesnt help when thers so much sufferings to block all of our rational senses, since emotions normally takes over us

Selfless action is always good, but sometimes most ppl do not have access to it, either becos they can be bother to make the opportunity or either they are dwellin too much in the problems.. I wish I can overcome my own delusion, hatred and this sudden feeling of lost….

I like the article above cos it does make sense but really hard to practice, cos feelings normally engulfed me like fogs, deludin n coverin my vision of reality. I love the selfless theory cos it does always makes me overcome that sense of self, that craving of extremeness in life - extremeness in being happy or sad ….

Anyway im just feelin a bit moody today…..

Take care all

Lov, Mel

Happy Piggy Year- Forecasts

Sunday, February 18th, 2007

Chinese Horoscopes forecasts

The Year of the Fire Pig begins on February 18 and will be observed all around the world by a 15-day celebration including colorful parades, fireworks, family reunions, and sumptuous meals.

Chinese astrologers predict that this will be an unstable year filled with conflict, because the Pig is a water sign, and water is incompatible with fire. Many people will experience sweeping changes, but there will be plenty of opportunity for prosperity for those who are able to meet the challenges and find a place of inner calm.

To find out what you can expect this year, order your complete 2007 Chinese Forecast. Meanwhile, here’s a quick look at how your sign will fare:

Don’t know your Chinese sign? Click here to find out.

Rat:
The Year of the Fire Pig is very prosperous for the industrious Rat. You will achieve important goals, and you will have a great deal of freedom to do as you please. You can live the good life by following your nose and trusting your intuition, as it will guide you toward a good source of income that you earn by using your natural talents.

Ox:
This isn’t likely to be a stellar year for the Ox, but if you stay focused and work hard, you’ll have everyone’s respect. It might seem like others are having a lot more fun than you, and this probably will be true. Rather than grumbling about how life isn’t fair, learn to appreciate the good things you do have and the people who love you. Next year will be better.

Tiger:
The Year of the Pig promises to be a lot of fun for the Tiger, who will be very popular and in social demand. Many of the invitations you get will be to parties, but there also will be opportunities to mix fun with working for your favorite humanitarian causes. Single Tigers have a good chance of meeting a new romantic partner as a result of all this networking.

Rabbit:
The Rabbit has a natural affinity with the Pig, so 2007 should be an excellent year for you. Your biggest challenge will be overcoming your natural shyness to take center stage and revel in the adoration that is heaped upon you. In both your professional and your private life, resist the temptation to downplay your talents and accomplishments, and take credit where credit is due.

Dragon:
Dragons are trailblazers, and you will get many opportunities to put your maverick ingenuity to good use in 2007. By heading in a new direction, you could net both recognition and financial rewards. The key lies in expressing your true talents and following your heart. Nothing less will get results. Leave behind your fear of not having enough, and cultivate abundance consciousness. Let your enterprising spirit soar.

Snake:
The Pig and the Snake are natural enemies, so this is not going to be the best of years for you. The Snake does not tolerate change very well, and changes are likely in 2007. Even when they are for the better, they may seem too abrupt for comfort. Fortunately, your natural endurance and social grace will carry you through. Hedge your finances by setting aside some funds for a rainy day.

Horse:
The Horse will feel very restless in 2007, making this a highly unpredictable year. How you fare depends largely on your attitude. If you respond to the demands of others by being rebellious and bolting out the door, you’ll experience ups and downs, especially regarding your finances. If you’d rather have some stability and security, form good working relationships and be a team player. The choice is yours.

Goat:
The Goat isn’t the most social of signs, but you’ll do well this year if you leave the comfort zone of home and family in order to expand your social network. The Goat and the Pig are natural allies, so you could have quite a bit of fun if you make an effort to meet new people. Don’t worry, they’ll love you, and they’ll find many ways to show their appreciation.

Monkey:
You’ll need to work hard to stay upbeat and positive in the Year of the Pig, but your efforts will pay off handsomely in terms of connections and material rewards. The Pig is a big party animal, so your best bet is to stay social and use your Monkey charm to talk your way into the hearts and minds of those who can help you. Maintain a can-do attitude.

Rooster:
Has anyone ever told you that you could use a little tact? If not, be advised that in the Year of the Pig, you’ll get what you want by being more diplomatic and lightening up. Doing so will assure that you get fair compensation for your hard work and diligence. Better still, it could win the heart of one special person. Overall, this should be a quite romantic year for you.

Dog:
The Dog will be very busy in the Year of the Pig. Not only will you do a lot of social networking, but you will engage in many activities to help your fellow humans. You will receive lots of praise and attention for your efforts, so prepare yourself to be in the spotlight. Just be sure to balance all that activity with some serious downtime so that you don’t wear yourself out.

Pig:
Simply put, the Pig can have it all in his own year. You are generous by nature and have much to give, and now you can expect to get even more back. Entertaining will be very much on your mind, with lavish parties and great company. Yet you’ll also be devoted to your work, and the payoff could be quite grand. Get your original ideas out and circulating, as all eyes are on you now.

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Politics - Trusteeship concept.

Saturday, February 17th, 2007

Practical Trusteeship Formula
Trusteeship provides a means of transforming the present capitalist order of society into an egalitarian one. It gives no quarter to capitalism, but gives the present owning class a chance of reforming itself. It is based on the faith that human nature is never beyond redemption.
It does not recognize any right of private ownership of property except so far as it may be permitted by society for its own welfare.
It does not exclude legislative regulation of the ownership and use of wealth.
Thus under State-regulated trusteeship, an individual will not be free to hold or use his wealth for selfish satisfaction or in disregard of the interests of society.
Just as it is proposed to fix a decent minimum living wage, even so a limit should be fixed for the maximum income that would be allowed to any person in society. The difference between such minimum and maximum incomes should be reasonable and equitable and variable from time to time so much so that the tendency would be towards obliteration of the difference.
Under the Gandhian economic order the character of production will be determined by social necessity and not by personal whim or greed.
(H, 25-10-1952, p. 301; the document, it is believed, was drafted by Prof. M. L. Dantwala) - taken from Gandhi Philosophy…

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Egalitarianism affirms, promotes, and believes in equal political, economic opportunity, social, and civil rights for all people. In actual practice, one may be considered an egalitarian in most areas listed above, even if not subscribing to equality in every possible area of individual difference- Source- Wikipedia

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Hi all,

Election again on the 24th of March +)

I ll just paste an interesting view for some of u’s to consider for the election… +)

Sometimes, too much power in an individual for a long time, may lead to a disaster.. So many has happened in this country, tho economic prosperity perhaps hide the most fundamental issue in this country, which atm would be the environment n also a danger of this country to capitalism(means of production are mostly privately[1] owned and operated for profit).

I would like to highlight the importance of morality as it is very important to move country fwd, w/o hurting anyone. Morality beyond all is quite important in trusteeship.

My point or advice is to choose ur frens, ur leader, or anyone, who values morality above all.

Lov, Mel

Sacred Heart

Wednesday, February 14th, 2007

A Tour of Your Sacred Heart

Being in an expanded heart space is a spiritual experience. But there is also some science to help us understand how the spirit of the heart works. Researchers at the Institute of HeartMath (an organization in

Boulder Creek

,

California

, devoted to studying the heart) have found that when people focus on a state of appreciation and love, their heart rhythm quite literally expands and becomes more harmonious. To measure this, researchers use EKGs and computer analysis to graph the heart-rate variability of a person and map it as a sine wave. During a state of love and appreciation, the sine wave of a person’s heart rate rhythm may become twice as big as usual, and much more even and orderly.

Physiologically, what is occurring is that a person’s breath slows down and the heart synchronizes to the breathing. During the inhalation, the heart beats faster than usual. On the exhalation, the heart slows. "I’m not saying we can measure the frequencies of love," says HeartMath researcher Rollin McCraty. "But when we feel love, it causes real changes in our body that we can measure."

Researchers at

Harvard

Medical

School

found the same kind of expanded heart rhythm occurring in long-time meditators during meditation sessions. One of the Harvard researchers called it an "exuberant" rhythm. In their report in Psychosomatic Medicine, the Harvard researchers speculated that humans might have a special "resonant frequency" at which many different biological rhythms–such as the heart rate and the breath–become synchronized. We humans seem to reach this resonant frequency, which creates harmony in the body, when we feel peace, gratitude, love and appreciation.

As I became more attuned to my own heart, I found I could sense other people’s heart rhythms in my own heart. It turns out a person’s heartbeat can be measured by delicate electromagnetic sensors from as far as four feet away. So what I began to experience is actually quite natural. At first, it seemed to happen only when I was doing a hands-on healing. Now, connecting my heart to my client’s heart is the basis of my healings. As I work, I can literally feel my client’s heart unwind and expand and come to rest in my heart rhythm. I can’t force it. I just invite it. I allow. I accept the person’s heart right where it is. As soon as I do, his or her heart usually opens. It melts into mine. I think a lot of healers work this way, sometimes even when they don’t know it. There are even a few studies that show the client’s heart comes into synchronicity with the healer’s heart.

Once that union occurs, we’re together. I’m not really "doing" a healing anymore. We’re in the same psychic space. If I hold a healing state, a state of deep peace and harmony, a state of total unconditional acceptance and presence, a person will accept it–just like if you pluck a guitar string, the sound will resonate through the whole room. In that space of the heart, people’s pain, physical, emotional, mental or spiritual, can melt away.

Healing doesn’t come from forcing something to change. It actually comes from accepting and loving what is. Things melt in that radiant love, whether its physical pain or emotional, even anger and broken bones or hurting guts or poverty consciousness. If you ever want to help someone grow or change, love them. Love them as they are. Hold for others the same awe and appreciation you feel when you look at something beautiful, like a mountain or an ocean, for each of us is beautiful in a profound way. Truly, that kind of unconditional love is the ultimate magic. You can even help yourself to grow and change by holding that state of love for yourself as well.

So this Valentine’s Day, why don’t you try a dose of that unconditional love? It will do wonders for your romance and your heart.

Happy Valentine’s day,

This morning at work I was greetins my fellow colleagues wif the above words.. So wonderful seein smiles n happiness in each one of them…. Im not very good in writing and expressing myself, so wot I can offer are stories n quotes to express my mind…

I watched the story of the weeping camel today. The stories is all about reuniting mother camel who despised her newborn baby… From the movie, I learnt how fragile each one of us, n how we all are connected in every way, to support, help n learn from each other…..I learnt that without loving kindness the world would be in chaos n most likely many beings wont survive.. Also I learnt how pure love from the heart truly matters for our sense of well being n for others as well….
I have come so far away, from wot I used to be… I used to be a pessimistic n I used to hate myself, my existence… I used to shut myself out of ppl, believing that most ppl cant b trusted n unkind… I guess wot truly matters not the ppl, but me… when I shut myself out, I have closed my heart, therefore creates insecurity n constant doubt in ppl…. I learnt to be forgiving in anything n everything cos thers no point to hurt urself so badly with all those negative energy….

Im telling you this with hope that one day, you’ll discover wots truly matters is your heart. Allow your heart be filled wif love to all beings n Be Happy…

Hugs n Kisses to All on this Val’s day +)

With Metta, Mel

Small Act of Kindness

Tuesday, February 13th, 2007
Do the great while it is still small.
-Tao Te Ching

From "Invisible Acts of Power" by Caroline Myss:

One evening during the summer, as I was sitting on my balcony, I noticed a young man waiting at the bus stop across the street from my home. He was about seventeen years old and dressed in every way that makes me nuts. His slacks were dragging on the concrete, completely covering his feet. I counted three tattoos on his muscled arms and a complement of pierced ears and eyebrow. Imitating my parents from thirty years ago, I thought, "What is wrong with these kids today? Why do they want to look like this?"

As I was manufacturing my own opinions about this boy, an older woman began to struggle across the street with oversize, heavy boxes. The young man noticed her, too, and, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, walked over and offered to help her. She gratefully released the boxes into his arms and led him to her car. He placed her belongings in the trunk, nodded, and turned to go, but in the most remarkable, touching way, the woman wrapped her arms around him and gave him a warm bear hug of a thank-you. Then she drove away. He stood smiling a moment and returned to the bus stop. Within a minute of that tender exchange, he was aboard his bus, leaving me alone on my porch to think about the extraordinary encounter I had just witnessed. Perhaps this young man would never think about that older woman again and the favor he had done for her. But the woman certainly would. She had been graced with help that had come out of nowhere just when she needed it…

I began to think about how little it takes to do a lot for someone else and about the amazing, long-range consequences of a single thoughtful act… What really takes place inside you when you respond to someone in need? Why do some people jump out of their seats to help another person, while others look the other way?… I think it is the invisible power of grace, moving between the open hearts of the giver and the receiver. The action itself, the lifting of a heavy piece of luggage or the drink of water offered to the thirsty man, may be small. But the energy that is channeled through the action is the high-voltage current of grace. It contains the power to renew someone’s faith in himself. It even has the power to save a life.

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Hi hi hi,

Hav u ever come across such thing??? Kindness if it comes from the heart in every way is always good… U will know when n wher to help cos that small voice in ur heart guides you…
The real happiness is when u hav that kindness n lov in ur heart cos u ll be easily satisfied, u ll find beauty in wot u do n in evrythin around u. Valentine’s day should not just be limited to couples since it is a day to cherish the kindness in ur heart n lov u hav for others…

Love is un-selfish in a way cos it is more about kindness n wishful thinkin on others wellbeing… on the other hand, desire is wot I called selfish… Desire n attachment is wot ppl normally misunderstand as love… Discourse on loving kindness mention as a mother who would risk their life to protect their own child illustrates the simple act of kindness n selflessness…

The story above is nuffin big, but it has deep n meaningful impact to those who experience it….

Happy Valentine’s day my dear frenssssss….

May love u hav can b shared to all…..

With hugs n lotsa of lov, Mel

Romantic Love: A Basic Human Need?

Monday, February 12th, 2007

Romantic Love: A Basic Human Need? by Diane W. Shannon, MD, MPH

Falling in love is an intense experience that can leave you feeling breathlessly out of control. Romantic comedies bring in millions of dollars portraying the zany antics of the love-stricken, while daytime dramas intrigue us with the plots and schemes of those in love. Song lyrics describe “love sickness” in all its glory. Just consider the words of “Love at First Sight,” a song by the 1980s rock group the Styx: Love at first sight It’s hard to keep your balance Moving past the point of no return Romantic Love, Lust, and Long-Term Attachment Whether you’ve fallen in love at first sight or not, you’ve probably felt the rush of sensations of early romantic love: elation, heightened energy, low appetite, sleeplessness, and the inability to concentrate on anything other than the object of your affection. Brain research has shown that lust and long-term attachment are controlled by specific centers in the brain. It seems reasonable to think that the same centers are responsible for romantic love. But new research has shown otherwise. Love Is Like…Thirst? Researchers in New York and New Jersey studied 17 college students who had been intensely in love for a relatively short period of time—17 months or less. The subjects looked at photographs of their beloved while undergoing functional magnetic resonance imaging (MRI). Functional MRI is a scanning technique that indicates which areas of the brain are most active at any given moment. The researchers found that the brain region associated with early romantic love was not the region already known to be related to lust or long-term attachment. Instead, the area of the brain most active in early romantic love is one associated with the most basic human drives: thirst, hunger, and craving. This region, located in the caudate nucleus and the ventral tegmental area (VTA), is also involved with reward-seeking and motivation. The VTA releases the neurotransmitter dopamine, which is increased when people anticipate a reward. For example, dopamine sites are more active in gamblers when they score or win. According to the study researchers, the fact that early romantic love is associated with neural activity in a brain region responsible for our most basic human needs shows that early romantic love is an “important evolutionary reproductive strategy.” It also provides a biological explanation for the intense drive associated with passionate love—explaining why, for example, some people contemplate stalking or suicide when rejected. Whereas lust drives us to find any suitable mate, romantic love pushes us to focus on a particular suitable mate. Later, in relationships that continue, long-term attachment encourages partners to share parenting duties to ensure their offspring survive, thus passing their genes on to the next generation. Breaking Up Is Hard to Do In a follow-up study, the same researchers are studying the brain activity of 17 men and women whose partner recently broke off the relationship. The subjects are being assessed with functional MRI as they look at photographs of their ex-partner. Early results indicate that during a break up, brain activity is heightened in areas of the brain near those associated with romantic love. These early findings may explain why being dumped can sometimes intensify romantic love. According to Helen Fisher, one of the study researchers, “As humans we have a highly motivated drive toward romantic love.” It may not matter to you or your beloved that the source of this drive is the same brain region that motivates you to go find a bottle of Evian or a plate of chocolate chip cookies when you’re parched or hungry. But it may explain why we pay millions of dollars to see "Sleepless in Seattle," "The Wedding Singer," and "Bridget Jones’s Diary." After all, romantic love is as basic to us as eating.

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No wonder we’re all so crazy about lovee huh??? Scientific explanation bout it quite interesting actually… Anyway, Valentine;s day is comin up.. I hope you all hav someone special to share it wif…

Lov. Mel

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Sunday, February 11th, 2007

Hi all,

Im listenin to chinese songs atm given by a frend n ohhh dear, I feel so touched … =(

Hmm My love life is pretty crap, cos each person that is dear to me, I hav to really let them go… This omen mayb means I probably destined to be a good Nun … LOL ….
Anyway, for the past few wks hav done lotsa of thinkin… Been hurted in a way by someone whos really dear to me n like usual I forgive .. I guess in some way it really makes me think that its enuf, enuf for me to hold on so tightly to my expectation n memories…

I am currently readin Bhagavad Gita n I would say tat, its quite entertainin n interestin book to read.. I really love this descriptions;

"Four kinds of good ppl - the sorrowin, the seeker after truth, the seeker of the bliss n the wise. The sorrowin wishes to end his sorrow, the truth seeker wishes to gain enlightment, the seeker of bliss wants salvation, the wise man is secure in the knowledge that wisdom is an end in itself."

I watched Samsara n somehow I can see the connection that evrythin will cancel out at the end… A qty potrayed in the movie, such as how can a drop of water can stay out of dryin n many others, really opens my eyes that woteva it is we desire n wants, at the end it really does not matter, cos we will go back to mother earth n wots really important is to b wise enuf to live in present n happy enuf to take woteva comes next…
To those who watched Samsara, U ll find all four types of ppl described above… Can U guess who’s who??? Interesting dont u think.. The wise one out of all the ppl ther, would be the wife of the ex monk, the sorrowin would b ppl in general, the truth seeker were all the monks, n the bliss seeker would b an ex monk who got married (husband).

The wise would be able to see a whole big picture in life. As described in the book, “ He has seen thru the myriad fruit offering seductions of maya. He is not deceived by the dangling carrots of sex, fame, money n power; by the dazzling effect of cause n effect. He knows that wisdom light is self charging, self glowing, self secure”.

I believe we all hav wisdom within us, no one is w/o it, the only thing is that delusions really blinds us.. including me…

But always trust in urself, U r the light of

ur

beings…

Lov, Mel